Shave and a Haircut! Two Bits!

Table Grape Vines in Need of a Haircut

Springtime means big time projects in the Bird Back 40. Yes -- it also means gardening -- but it can also involve prepping for the upcoming summer fresh fruit season. If you had the pleasure of growing up in the Central San Joaquin Valley, you've had the pleasure of tasting some of the best fruit that our hot, dry summers have to offer. I am sometimes amazed by the bounty of fruit and produce that this valley produces, from southern Kern County to northern Shasta County.

Short and sweet? We can grow just about everything here. We help feed the entire nation when it comes to some crops. We're spoiled. And I like it that way!

Warning! Pruning Job Ahead!

One crop that grows particularly well in this valley? Grapes! Not just any grapes mind you -- but my favorite: The Table Grape. California leads the nation in both wine and table grape production. Wine grapes get most of the ink because this nation has a never-ending love affair with all things wine. I find it strange that I never did develop a taste for vino. After all, I love grapes. It should make sense, then, that I would love wine. Right?

Wrong. I can't stand the taste of wine. I love grape juice. I absolutely love any type of cider made from pomegranates, pears, apples, etc. But I can't do wine.

Color me strange.

Venus and Audrey with Fantasy Table Grapes

We are now headed into the fourth year of table grape production in the Bird Back 40. Last year was simply off the hook in terms of table grape production, even though I probably lost 40% to 50% of the crop to a scourge called powdery mildew. Even though I have no problem using controls to combat this problem, I discovered too late last season that the product I had been using protects against a bevy of diseases, except powdery mildew. By the time I finally did procure the right controls? It was already too late.

I won't have that problem this year.

I always encourage others to grow grapes in a backyard or side yard or even turn part of a front yard into a productive and pretty arbor. They're easy to grow and deliver a tasty snack for months on end. But if there's one thing I've learned? Grape vines need care. The more you care for them? The better they will be to you in terms of a tasty harvest. I've also come to discover that field hands who do this dirty work of tending vines deserve hazard pay. This isn't an easy task.

Red Suffolk Table Grapes Protected by Bird Netting

There are a multitude of ways to prune grape vines. It seems like commercial growers are always coming up with one ingenious way or another to prune a vine so it will provide a fatter harvest. The better the harvest? The better the profit margin!

In my case? I practice two tried and true forms of pruning: Spur pruning and Cane pruning. I find spur pruning works best with some varieties of table grapes, while cane pruning works better with others. In some cases? With some varieties like the Black Monukka? It really doesn't matter. The Black Monukka is going to deliver a whopper harvest no matter how it's pruned. Simply put? The Black Monukka is one of the best tasting table grapes that you can plant in your backyard.

Marquitos Points Out Two Year Old Wood

The fruit for this year's harvest is going to come from the spurs or canes that emerged during last year's growing season. It's the first-year wood that you're looking to save during the "shave and a haircut" process. While I've discovered, by accident mind you, that two year old wood will also produce fruit, it won't produce as much as the first-year wood.

Some table grape varieties will produce a multitude of new canes during the growing season. Some don't. For those that don't produce a lot of new canes during the growth season? I practice spur pruning. And then there are others like Fantasy and Flame that produce so many new shoots during the spring and summer that it's tough to decide what to keep and what to completely prune away.

Partially Trimmed Vines

Spotting the two year old vines is easy enough. First, the wood is a bit darker. Secondly, it's wood that I tied to my grape vine trellis with green stretchy tape last year. This is wood that I will want to completely cut away as it served as last year's fruiting canes. They aren't needed anymore.

The second step is locating and keeping the fattest and thickest canes that emerged from the trunk of the vine the previous season. With some vines, it's obvious. With others? Not so much. When it comes to spur pruning a vine, one only needs to keep two of the strongest canes that emerged the previous season. Sometimes you have ten to choose from, which means you're doing a lot of cutting.

Vines Pruned and Tied to Trellis

The Flame table grape variety, for example, must have produced 20 new shoots last season. It was probably the fastest growing vine out of the bunch. But I could only keep three of the best branches, which means 17 others got pruned away along with the old wood.

Another thing to watch out for? Bending a particular branch in one way or another can result in a whipping motion that leaves a nice little red welt on your face or neck. Remember what I told you about field hands and hazard pay?

But, the moment finally does come when you've completely pruned each vine and kept only the best canes. These are the canes that will serve as this year's fruit producers. The job isn't quite done yet. These canes need to be tied down, or trained, to move in one direction or another. Sometimes they don't want to move in the direction you want them to move in. They will remind you of this when slapping you across the face once you've made the mistake of letting go of a vine before you've got it tied down. Or sometimes that green stretchy tape snaps. Oh, the horror.

Vines in Springtime

There comes a time, however, when the job is finished. The canes and spurs are tied down against the trellis. The vines have been fertilized. Everything looks neat and tidy. You're ready for the new season.

As for the numerous canes that were pruned away and are now lying on the ground? Those serve a purpose as well. This is how you start new vines. Simply cut a section of vine about a foot long, stick it in a pot with a bit of soil. And, with any luck, that vine will begin to produce roots below the soil line and green shoots above. I farmed out a number of cuttings to people connected with the Sacramento Chapter of the California Rare Fruit Growers (CRFG). I even had one request for canes from a grower in Chicago, IL.

Red Suffolk Table Grapes (Delicious)

Will California vines grow in a Chicago backyard? Good question. I don't really know. But a grower is willing to give it a try. Gardening really is an exercise in trial and error. Mistakes by the dozens are made in this journey.

But when you find yourself munching on a plate of fat and juicy Red Flame grapes this summer? It's well worth it.

A Royal Harvest

Ripe Royal Rainier Cherries-Bird Back 40

What's better than a bag of freshly harvested Royal Rainier Cherries? This is a trick question. There can be only one answer. And that answer is two bags of freshly harvested Royal Rainier Cherries.

What's better than two bags of freshly harvested Royal Rainier Cherries? Nevermind...

Welcome to the Bird Back 40 where the 2012 fresh fruit season is officially ON! The first to ripen up? You might have guessed it by now: Royal Rainier Cherries. This is is Year 4 for the Royal Rainier Cherry tree. Last year's harvest of 4 lbs. was "decent" in my opinion.

A Sweet Treat: The Royal Rainier Cherry

This year's harvest of 20 lbs. is off the hook. My friends, we are truly blessed.

My deepest debt and gratitude to sister-in-law Leana Stromberg who snapped these incredible harvest photos with a camera not purchased from something closely resembling a gumball machine. I've got to stop doing that. I never do learn my lesson. Cameras purchased from something closely resembling a gumball machine just aren't going to pay off as the "world's wisest investment."

Not only did Leana volunteer her photographic talents, she also drafted the services of her son, daughter and husband. Unlike last year where we had the kids for "fun," and really didn't need them for a 4 lb. cherry harvest, this year was somewhat different.

Celina & Marquitos: Ready for Harvest

This year was work. Do you know what it's like to harvest 20 lbs. of cherries? I can tell you that they don't just fall off the tree and into your collection bag! This is difficult work people! But the sweet payoff is well worth it.

The wife that is Venus and I, with an assist from my brother Andy, netted the tree about two weeks ago -- just in the Royal Rainier nick-of-time. The two pesky mockingbirds that made a mockery of my netting efforts last year made a return visit to the Backyard of Bird just a few short weeks ago.

If there's anything I did learn about my netting efforts last year, it's this: I'm terrible at putting up nets to protect fruit trees against pesky mockingbirds intent on stealing the crop. Not only did I manage to break off a number of branches during my initial effort, the birds kept finding a way in. No matter what the fix -- a bird with a pea-sized brain ALWAYS kept foiling this Bird's best netting efforts.

Last Years Netting Effort: FAIL!

Intent is a wonderful thing. I had INTENDED to build a PVC cage to hold my netting this year at the advice of a gardening mentor and others who had undertaken the same task. But "intent" doesn't always equal results. That was certainly the case when it came time to net the tree this year. The intent to build a PVC cage never did grow into an actual result -- so it was back to the old netting experience that I failed so miserably at the year before.

If there's one caveat in this repeat -- it would have to be the X-Factor that is Venus. See -- the wife has no problems reminding me of what works and what doesn't work in the Bird Back 40 garden setting. As soon as she saw me dragging out last year's netting setup that failed so miserably, she immediately reminded me of my multiple failures last year and promptly took over.

The Royal Rainier Cherry Tree

Leave it up to the wife to devise a plan that foiled the best intentions of a flock of mockingbirds. Despite numerous attempts to foil her fine work -- they never did find a way in. They would have to be content at stealing the one or two cherries that were closest to the net opening. The vast majority of the crop remained unmolested.

That's why I'm writing about a wallop of a harvest this year. And it's quite the wallop indeed. It's also the harvest that brings about the most pride in backyard harvests.

You see -- the Royal Rainier Cherry is fairly unique. Although it may resemble a normal Rainier Cherry, there is a considerable difference in appearance, and more importantly, taste. Royal Rainier Cherries are sweet treats to the taste buds indeed. This is a Dave Wilson Nursery Taste Test Award Winner -- a certified treat for any fresh fruit grower.

Weighing the Crop

So -- what's the plan for this year's Royal Rainier crop? Fresh eating is almost certainly on the menu. Bill Bird can polish off a pound of cherries in a single setting. It's not that difficult once you get started.

Leana, Mark and the kids also received a bounty's share for their help in getting the harvest down off the tree and into the house, where it could be processed and weighed. Unlike last year, both children have grown quite fond of cherries. My guess is a pound or two of them probably never made it into the collection bowls.

I can't blame them. My love of cherries was born years ago in the countless trees that grace nearly every backyard of those older Modesto subdivisions. There was nothing more heavenly to climb into a giant cherry tree and eat my fill before literally falling out. I wasn't the world's best tree climber to be brutally honest. I could climb like no other. Getting down was a different story entirely...

Cherries Anyone?

Although the Royal Rainier and Black Tartarian Cherry trees that grace our North Natomas spread aren't quite to "kid-climbing size" just yet -- with every passing year they do get closer. I may be a very old man indeed before I can witness the joys of another child climb those branches for a warm spring afternoon meal of cherries, but it will be well worth the wait.

Perhaps they will be kind enough to bring down a bag or two for me.

Dream a Little Dream

Corn Skewers, Duh!

"Dream on Bill Bird, Dream on!" Those would be the somewhat facetious words of the wife that is Venus as I pondered a recent purchase in our nearby Safeway Supermarket. As you can tell from the photo to your right? I did make that purchase.

"Are you thinking about using those corn cob holders on our corn crop this year darling," she questioned in a teasing sort of way. After all -- last year's complete and total corn crop failure was still in her mind (and mine as well I must say). There would be no fresh corn from the backyard last year -- just the nearby Farmer's Market.

It's a complete and utter failure that I blamed on 49ers Quarterback Alex Smith -- and no -- I still haven't changed my opinion on this. Sure the weather was crappy. But Alex was even crappier.

Enough said on the subject. I could fill blog volumes on this particular item. We won't go there. We will instead focus on happier things.

Like, corn for example.

2011 Fresh Corn Crop!

The so-called "test bed" is once again in use this year in the Bird Back 40 -- although it is a tad smaller. This is what happens when you start claiming corners and sides of said bed for additional fruit and citrus tree plantings. Still -- the remaining plot was amended dutifully earlier this spring with compost and fertilizers -- worked deep into that hard clay bedrock that is the Bird Back 40.

The Mantis Rototiller is indeed an amazing tool to have when tackling jobs (did someone say tackle?) such as this. This is our third year for using the test bed. And with each year -- I'm able to churn up and reclaim another inch or two of soil that had been hard pan.

As you can tell from the photo above -- this year's corn crop is indeed off to a rousing start. Despite the less-than-perfect spring weather, the first two rows are well on their way. Venus and farmer-in-training Marquitos Stromberg added a third row two weeks ago, and that has already popped out of the ground. I added the final three rows this past weekend.

That's six delicious rows of Golden Bantam Corn if you're counting -- ten to eleven plants per row. Do you think that's enough for your average backyard plot? Venus has also planted three to four rows of a baby corn variety in another bed on the other side of the Back 40. If you place these varieties too close to one another -- they will cross pollinate -- leading to a mutant and non-edible mess.

2009 Corn Crop

This is a lesson we learned during our first year in the test bed. This is why we call it the "test bed." It also has other names that I shall not share at this time because this is a family blog.

And yes -- if you're wondering -- Golden Bantam would be considered an "heirloom" variety. The original strain of Golden Bantam was introduced by W. Atlee Burpee in 1902. These stalks will grow to a height of five to six feet -- and produce golden yellow ears that are five-to-seven inches long.

The taste you ask? Well -- there's a reason why heirloom varieties like Cherokee Purple tomatoes and Golden Bantam corn stick around for this long. Sure -- larger and more productive strains of yellow corn have been hybridized since Burpee first offered the Golden Bantam.

But nothing beats that old world taste -- and that's what you get with each lip-smacking and crunchy ear of Golden Bantam corn. It's also a good canning variety plus the ears freeze well -- which is another reason for its usage.

Golden Bantam Corn at Three Weeks

Once again -- our test bed has been reserved for "a little bit of everything." There are some tomato plants that I've stuck in there -- but not nearly as many as in past years. The bed is also home to watermelon, cantaloupe and pumpkin crops. It's a large side yard of the Bird Back 40 -- so the vines have "room to run."

As for the corn cob holders -- it was about time that we invested in something new. Most of our original corn cob skewers were of the heirloom variety themselves. In other words, they came from mom's house. They were -- how do you say -- a tad worn.

My hope and dream is that the Birds bounce back with the kind of corn-y year that we experienced in 2009 -- our first year for the test bed. Corn crops grew large and lush and delivered some tasty offerings before the mutants moved in and took over.

I'd like to say that last year was just an aberration -- but then again -- Alex Smith is still the starting quarterback for your San Francisco 49ers.

That's enough to scare any backyard farmer.

Mind Your P's and Q'uitos!

Nephew Marquitos with pea pod victim!

"Wouldn't that make the perfect title for the blog?" the wife that is Venus questioned during a sun-drenched Easter Sunday afternoon as nephew Marquitos Stromberg munched on a mound of freshly harvested peas nearby.

"I don't know," was my response. "I was thinking along the line of 'A Pound of Peas From the Garden Please'," to be honest.

"No," she said. "That's just stupid (a line I hear often to many a suggestion)."

Guess who won that argument? Dear Lord, the wife is taking over the blog. Things will never be the same. Don't be surprised if you find a shrine to all things Duran Duran in the coming weeks.

Freshly harvested pea pods from the Bird garden

Actually -- it's not a bad title to be brutally honest. The garden played a rather large and fulfilling role in our Easter Feast at the Bird House -- where we hosted children, aunts, uncles, sister-in-laws, cousins and even a brother or two. It was a packed Bird House -- and we kind of like it that way.

On the menu for Easter Sunday? How does a ham slathered and basted with freshly harvested honey from the Hello Kitty Hive sound? Fresh peas from the garden? Radishes galore and spinach from the spring and still bountiful fall gardens? Freshly harvested beets for the Easter salad? The garden production was on full display -- and nobody went home unhappy (or hungry I might add).

But the best part of Easter Sunday is children. No celebration is complete without the young ones. Bill and Venus played host this past holiday to four of them -- ranging in age from one (NFL linebacker in waiting Brennan Sullivan) to seven (Marquitos Stromberg). Children make holidays special -- and no holiday was more special than the one we celebrated this past Sunday.

Of course -- no Easter is complete without an old-fashioned Easter Egg hunt. And Easter Eggs hide easy in a mound of bushy pea plants or under the shade of a yet-to-be-harvested Easter Egg radish. But -- as Venus and I were delighted to learn -- the kids took the greatest joy in what came after: the harvest.

Champion Radish Harvester: Aiden Sullivan

Aiden Sullivan isn't exactly keen on the consumption of vegetables just yet -- much to the chagrin of his mother, Alice. His younger brother is -- but that doesn't really count -- as Brennan will eat just about anything in his path, including raw iron. Ever heard of a child that doesn't reject any sort of consumable item put in front of him? Ladies and Gentlemen -- may I introduce you to Brennan Sullivan. I would show you a photo of him -- but the poor lad is still eating.

Aiden -- however -- proved himself to be the champion harvester of all things radish. And once he had pulled one of those bright pink Easter Egg radish orbs from the ground and saw what awaited -- nothing could stop him from going back for more. The same applied to Marquitos and sister Celina Stromberg. Let's just say the Easter Sunday salad was a bit "radish heavy" after the "picking party" came to a merciful end.

But I've got to give credit where credit is due for this one. Venus planted this radish patch exactly six weeks ago with the hopes that her efforts would be ready for harvest in time for this very special holiday. The wife's planning paid off in droves. Perhaps her momentary takeover of the blog isn't such a bad thing after all.

Celina Stromberg: Ready for Radish Harvest

But I draw the line at a shrine to all things Duran Duran. Did they write a song about harvesting radishes? Nuff said.

But to be completely honest? It's the pea harvest that opened my eyes a bit. When Venus brought the first bowl of peas inside the garden to be shelled for the upcoming holiday feast -- I could not believe that we had actually grown quite this many. When she further confided in me that this was -- perhaps 25% of the harvest and another 75% was yet to come? Folks -- that's something to get excited about.

I'm never going to scream about peas -- thought I'm not about to push them away either. While it might be true that I'm not exactly wild about some vegetables -- peas are not on that list. Unfortunately -- I never had any experience with them as a child -- unless they came out of a can or were frozen inside of a bag. What are fresh peas like?

Nothing that comes out of a can or a bag -- that much I can tell you.

Pounds of Peas for Easter

An unopened pod full of peas is a treasure that has yet to be uncovered. There's nothing quite like the experience of unzipping a long pod -- only to discover a sweet tasting treat inside. Freshly harvested peas are indeed SWEET -- and crunchy to much on. This might explain why Marquitos has such a love for them. The boy has developed a love affair with peas and other garden produce at an age when many boys reject foods that come colored in green.

The first harvest from the Bird garden resulted in more than 1.5 lbs. of peas. I won't lie. It could have yielded twice that amount. This has been quite the year for fresh pea production in the Backyard of Bird. I wish I could tell you the secret. When I find out just exactly what we did right -- I'll let you know.

An Easter harvest to remember

There are those rare holiday celebrations where everything goes well. They include those celebrations where you don't exactly realize just how good it was -- until it comes to an end. All that's left are the memories of a special day with family and friends.

Easter Sunday, 2011, was indeed one of those days. I'm still not quite ready to believe that it's over. Yes, the children that made this day special are indeed gone.

But the pea harvest continues...

From BUST to BOOM in Nine Months

Bees Swarming to Meet You!

BOOM!

So -- is this what it feels like? To be a successful home beekeeper hobbyist? Folks -- I was an utter and complete FAILURE at this exercise when decided to adopt this hobby out of pure frustration a few years back. I too -- knew what it was like -- to have the shape of an "L" on my forehead.

I was "expert" at losing hives. I was an even bigger "expert" at losing queens. No matter what I tried -- no matter what I did -- I FAILED and failed MISERABLY.

But all of that seems so long ago now. Because -- today? I'm a successful beekeeper hobbyist as the photo to the upper right will attest. That is the current state of the neon pink Hello Kitty Hive. To put it short and sweet? It's loaded -- both deeps are packed solid with bees so thick that they fall out of the hive like a graceful curtain blowing in the wind.

One-Half of the Hello Kitty Hive

Much to my chagrin -- and the chagrin of others in the neighborhood -- the hive has now swarmed three times this spring. While many beekeepers are proud of swarms -- because it is the sign of a massively reproductive hive -- they do their level best to prevent it. A swarm happens when a hive becomes jam packed and overcrowded. But it also means you lose precious numbers of beekeeping friends that could have been better put to work making fresh honey for the wife that is Venus.

Beekeeper Keith Scott took these amazing photographs last week while collecting Swarm #2 -- that had come to rest behind the Dinner Plate Honeysuckle Vine. What he witnessed and photographed surprised even the most experienced of beekeepers. Tens of thousands of bees were still packed tightly into the hive even after the second swarm. Tens of thousands remain after Swarm #3 took place this past weekend.

I was surprised to find out that the activity gained the interest of a none-too pleased neighbor. I can't blame him for his dismay -- nor the note he left behind on the blog. If you do not have any experience with watching a hive suddenly swarm into the open on a bright and sunny day -- it can be one of the most terrifying and fascinating events to watch unfold.

Nobody ever said nature was pretty.

Bee Swarm #II in the Dinner Plate Honeysuckle Vine

To protect the innocent -- we'll call this neighbor "Mr. Neighbor." He left this note in the comments section of the blog: "As one of your nearby neighbors, I am a little less than amused by a swarming of bees. It seems to be happening again today (Apr 9th)...might have been nice if we had been warned or even given a choice as to whether or not we wanted this influx of bees."

Some of my more hardened beekeeping friends came to my defense by suggesting that I leave the next swarm in his bed. As much as I chuckled at the "Godfatherly" suggestion -- I was also concerned. I want to be a good neighbor. I like my neighbors. Sure -- Venus and I could have moved out to acreage from North Natomas into Rio Linda -- but that also meant isolation.

I've done that. I've been there. I had my two acres. I couldn't stand the quiet. I hated the privacy that acreage brings. I didn't know my neighbors from Jack. Bill Bird is a product of the Modesto, CA suburbs. I like waving to neighbors as I drive down the street. 4th of July Block Parties shared with family and neighbors are the bomb. Nothing is better -- in my opinion -- that a boatload of children screaming out TRICK OR TREAT on Halloween night.

Nephew Marquitos Stromberg With Yellow Carrot Harvest

Mr. Neighbor would later add that he had a grandaughter that very much enjoyed visting the home and backyard of her grandparents -- which I also identified with. Venus and I have not been blessed with the gift of children. We instead smother our love and affection on nephew Marquitos and niece Celina -- who reward us with "most favored destination" status. Can you imagine then -- how we would feel if Marquitos and Celina were suddenly too scared to visit "Tío and Tía?"

We would be crushed. Mr. Neighbor and his wife would feel equally crushed if their grandaughter reacted in the same manner. I can understand and identify with that concern. I can also identify with the fact that -- while bees are legal to keep in Sacramento City limits -- they can also be classified as nuisance problems. Therefore, it's best to reach out and react before problems are allowed to fester into something larger.

Promising "Mr. Neighbor" a jar of honey for his troubles also helped smooth things over a bit, as did a message of understanding. When the bees swarmed for the first time nearly two weeks ago, leaving a resulting mass of bees on a nearby peach tree, I wasn't sure what to do. I certainly did not approach them. Were they agitated? Would they reach out and "touch me" with a stinging party? I didn't know -- and I surely didn't want to find out.

Honeybees Preparing to Swarm

But the nice thing about beekeeping is this: you learn the basics from others. You find out that swarms are just a part of nature and nothing more. Better yet -- swarms of Italian honeybees are as harmless as any bee colony will ever be. You can reach out and run your hand over the top of one -- provided you have the nerve -- and they will not instinctively react with a stinging party. They have no hive to protect -- therefore -- no reason to sting.

And so -- much to the delight -- and chagrin -- of some -- Bill Bird is now a successful beekeeper with a strong colony inside that bright pink Hello Kitty Hive. What is my secret? How did this failure of a hobbyist beekeeper go from BUST to BOOM overnight? How did three frames worth of bees delivered last June result in a massive hive nine months later that is so healthy it's splitting at a record rate?

I wish I could tell you the secret. I'd like to know myself. While Venus and I did make every effort to keep the hive in sugar water during the first few months -- once the bees turned aggressive last October -- and our pathway to the hive turned into a mudpit -- we ended our feeding efforts. To be brutally honest? We didn't do a darn thing. We stayed away.

As it turns out? They didn't need our help. As it turns out? I have far more pollen sources around this North Natomas home than I ever dreamed possible. A colony this strong -- this large and this lush doesn't get this way overnight without a steady source of pollen from a variety of sources.

A Keith Scott Photo

Obviously? The bees found that source. I find that the colony is also very adept at "planting" its own sources of pollen around the hive. Am I trying to tell you that I have bees that farm? I can only tell you that the clover that is springing up in every corner of the Bird Back 40 is coming from somewhere -- seeds of which that have no doubt been deposited by a passing bee. I certainly didn't put it there.

The end result is this: Bill and Venus Bird have the pollinators that they desperately sought in 2007. Roseville area beekeeper Keith Scott is getting fat in the beekeeping hobbyist business with three new colonies catpured from the Bird Back 40. Neighbors like "Mr. Neighbor" and Greg and Dara DiBiase and many others are getting treated to a swarm show that many people never get to witness in person.

Interesting? Without a doubt. A learning experience? Of course! And the show is now just begining. Act II of the beekeeping experience moves from pollination to honey collection later this summer.

Stay tuned...