Welcome to the Land of Corn and ... CORN!

Golden Bantam Corn

There goes my attempt at a snappy title. Sigh

As the photo to your immediate right clearly shows -- it is "corn season" in the Backyard of Bird." The harvest is back -- and back in a big way this summer after an absolutely horrible showing last year -- a fact that I blamed on 49ers Quarterback Alex Smith.

Don't get me wrong here. Alex Smith is still an unbelievable FLOP in the NFL -- and for some strange reason he's back for yet another MISERABLE season in the City by the Bay. As KFI Radio -- and former NewsTalk 1530 KFBK personality extraordinaire -- Shannon Farren correctly posted on Facebook recently: "7 years of Alex Smith. Who broke that damn mirror?"

Shannon was never one to hide her feelings -- nor the occasional F-Bomb dropped in a newsroom setting.

OK -- so it wasn't occasional. Shannon's language in a radio newsroom could and did make more than one sailor blush. But that's another story for another day.

Test Bed: Bird Back 40

Point is -- Alex Smith is still stinking it up in the City by the Bay -- but fortunately that bad voodoo hasn't affected the Bird corn offerings this year. The test bed is churning out record amounts of beautiful corn on the cob in 2011 -- and we're just getting started. The production has been limited to the first two rows that the wife that is Venus and I planted earlier this spring.

Still to come? About five more rows. Provided the weather holds -- we'll be harvesting giant ears of corn through September.

Final Golden Bantam Harvest: 13 ears

My friends, there is nothing quite like hoofing it out to the corn patch on a weekend evening and pulling a fat fresh ear of corn or four off the backyard stalks. Venus and I started harvesting shortly after returning from Santa Cruz two weeks ago -- and fresh corn on the cob has been a staple on the evening menu ever since. Tonight's final harvest resulted in a Baker's Dozen -- 13 ears -- which is now sitting in a freezer.

Thanks to a couple of recipe suggestions and canning recipes delivered by Farmer Fred Hoffman -- we will be enjoying fresh-from-the-backyard corn all winter long.

Emerging Ears of Lip-Smacking Golden Bantam Corn

The variety in question is an heirloom variety. First offered through Burpee gardening catalogs in 1902, the variety called Golden Bantam is still going strong. It's not hard to figure out why gardeners are somewhat partial to this variety. Stalks of Golden Bantam corn deliver ears that are more than a foot long. It's not the sweetest corn you'll taste in your lifetime -- but it is special nonetheless.

I was somewhat shocked to discover that this yellow corn variety also resulted in kernels that were colored a bright orange. At first? I thought this might have been the result of leaving the corn on the stalk for a might too long. But those fears were unfounded. Venus and I were happy to discover that each orange-colored kernel was packed with a jolt of natural sugar.

Bright Yellow and Orange Kernels on Golden Bantam

Unfortunately -- the Golden Bantam seed that I ordered three years ago from Pinetree Garden Seeds didn't last beyond the first two rows. That forced us to turn to another variety of yellow corn seed that we purchased last year from Lockhart Seed Company in Stockton.

The Lockhart Seed wasn't an heirloom variety. Lockhart Seed doesn't necessarily specialize in heirloom varieties, which isn't bad. What Lockhart Seed does specialize in is varieties that are specifically adapted to our San Joaquin and Sacramento Valley climates. Although it's entirely probably that some cross-pollination has taken place with the later varieties -- my hope (prayer would probably be a better word) is that since both are yellow varieties, we should be OK.

That's my hope anyway. I've seen cross-pollination before between yellow, white and baby corn varieties that have been planted far to close together. The results are indeed Frankensteinish. And the taste wasn't all that good either.

The variety in question -- Bodacious -- was planted about a month after the Golden Bantam -- and the stalks are now about four feet in height. The first green tassels from the developing ears have already emerged and my best guess is that we're still another three weeks away from a first harvest -- provided the weather holds. We have been lucky in that respect. After a colder than normal spring, the last two months have been outstanding.

And so my friends -- I come to you with this advice. If you live in the Sacramento Valley and have a small plot of room -- you can plant corn and you can harvest delicious ears later in the summer.

This is despite the presence of a quarterback named Alex Smith who appears have locked up yet another year of starting play for your San Francisco 49ers.

Keep the bar well stocked. It's going to be yet another long winter.

My Corn Fails Like Alex Smith

FAIL!

Boy -- that sure was fast. I never expected the end of the 2010-2011 football season to come in early September -- but when the 49ers and Raiders turn in the kind of "El Stinko" type of performances that both squads turned in yesterday -- well -- it begs the following question:

When does basketball/baseball/hockey/tiddlywinks season start again?

Whatever the answer is -- it can't be soon enough. There's nothing like putting off an entire's day worth of work in the garden to watch something so horrible that will make you regret putting off an entire day's worth of work in the garden.

Jeez! I could have planted my lawn by now!

Total Crop Failure!

As I was staring at the complete crop failure that is my corn this Monday morning -- it reminded me that I hadn't seen anything quite this bad or demoralizing since -- well -- yesterday's Seahawks-49ers opener. And then -- it hit me: my corn failed as badly on me this season as Alex Smith failed the San Francisco 49ers.

There's no way around it. There's no hiding the disaster. It's right in front for everyone to see: a complete and utter failure. My 2010 summer corn crop and the latest reincarnation of Alex Smith.

I will say this much however: last year -- I had a great crop of corn -- a wonderful harvest that I blogged about here. So -- at least I can say that I had ONE good year under my belt.

As for Alex Smith -- well -- no....

Sickly Corn

To be brutally honest though -- I'm not sure what exactly what went wrong with the Bird corn crop this year. However -- I can tell you that we're not alone. A lot of other gardeners reported the same garden lament to me this season: total and complete corn crop failure.

The seeds for this year's crop of Golden Cross Bantam came from Lockhart Seed in Stockton. I knew -- from last year's experience -- that seeds from different varieties should not be planted close together (they will cross-pollinate and you'll get all sorts of weird and wacky combinations). We used a bed located close to a bed that was used for last year's successful corn plantings -- after amending it -- of course.

Venus and I planted seed for the first two rows in Mid-April. We planted a third and fourth row some three weeks later in early May. The fifth and sixth rows were planted two weeks later -- after other seeds had germinated and jumped out of the ground.

Everything looked A-OK at first. Sure -- the weather wasn't cooperating all that much. Sure -- it was cold. And yes -- that cold weather would have an effect on the other crops like tomatoes -- melons and squash.

But it didn't result in outright failures either.

Purple-Colored Corn Stalks

Nope -- the first sign that something wasn't quite right in Dodge was when I noticed this purple coloring showing up in some of the first rows that we had planted. It seemed a little strange -- yes -- but then again -- we were also experimenting with a new variety. Perhaps this is the way it should look?

But -- as the growing season moved forward -- I began to notice signs that something just wasn't right. Normally strong corn stalks were rather thin and wispy. Developing tassels weren't growing far beyond the weakened stalks. Worse yet -- the purple color I had noticed near the bottom of the stalks was slowly moving up the plant.

Soon -- it would overtake the entire row.

The end result? Venus and I managed to grow a lot of corn cobbettes rather than actual cobs. They didn't taste very good either -- and the harvest just wasnt worth our time. Additionally -- the later rows that we had planted were not doing as well as we had expected. They were stunted in growth. They seemed to be lacking in something.

Now -- to be fair and honest -- I'm not the only Natomas gardener to suffer a complete corn crop failure this season. Others had the same type of problem. They didn't plant as much as Venus and I had -- but they all had similar problems: purplish coloring on the stalks -- weakened stalks -- and little to no corn production.

In other words -- we weren't alone. Misery loves company.

So -- what went wrong? I'm not sure. I know it wasn't a lack of fertilizer or water. Our crops received regular fertilization and were on the same drip system that our successful corn crop utilized last season. Other crops planted nearby -- such as squash and tomatoes -- exhibited much better production.

Could it have been the unseasonable cool weather? That is a possibility. Corn -- like a lot of other summer crops -- needs sustained summer heat to do well. We didn't get a whole lot of that this season.

So -- in retrospect -- it could have been a lot of things. It could have been a combination of different factors.

As for me? I'm blaming my crop failure on Alex Smith.

3-2-1 GERMINATION!!! Germination in North Natomas!!!

Well -- isn't this just a fine "how do ya do?"

In fact -- it's just downright embarassin! A crime against MANkind. It shouldn't be allowed! Personal Foul! Flagged for excessive celebration!

It's the wife that is Venus who is celebrating tonight. And chortling just a bit too much I might add.

What is causing so much mirth in the Bird household? Our seed starting efforts -- of course. It's always a race between us. Who will do better? Bill Bird the Big Mouth Blogger Extraordinaire? Venus "Magic Green Thumb" Stromberg?

If you're guessing Bill Bird -- "No Soup for You!" The wife isn't only beating the pants off me when it comes to heirloom tomato, pepper and eggplant seed germination efforts -- as the photo to the right shows -- she's sort of SKUNKED me.

Yep -- just five short days after planting our 2010 heirloom tomato, pepper and eggplant garden -- every single seedling tray that she planted has busted out in NBC style "Peacock" color. I've never seen anyone get so darn lucky. I mean -- usually -- there's one failure somewhere -- right?

Oh -- not with the wife there isn't. She's just got that magic touch. As for me? The Blogger? Hey -- I've got some decent germination going here! But there are those -- ahem -- *few* seedling trays that haven't quite broken ground yet.

Actually -- to be brutally honest -- we're off to the most amazing start this year. And it's a late start at that. Normally? We plant the weekend after the Super Bowl -- which is usually early February. But the Super Bowl came a tad later than normal -- and we didn't get around to setting our first seeds until the following weekend -- February 15th.

That was a Monday. Here it is -- a Saturday. It's six days later. And everything the wife has planted (tomato and eggplant wise) has come up roses. The pepper seeds the wife planted haven't come up yet -- but that's just peppers. They're sort of like wallflowers at first. They take a while to get going -- and maybe a jolt of Jack Daniels.

So what's the deal? Are we doing anything different this year from last year? As a matter of fact, that answer would be YES.

With previous seed starting efforts -- the wife and I have always relied upon those handy, dandy, reliable, Jiffy Brand seed starting trays. You know the ones that come with those compressed pellets of peat moss? You put some warm water on them and they suddenly look like an egg pod straight out of Alien? Yeah, those are the ones.

But last year -- to be honest -- we didn't have the best germination efforts with the two trays that we purchased. Sure enough -- every variety did eventually come up -- but I threw away far too many pods that were planted with seed that produced nothing. I normally haven't had this kind of germination trouble with the Jiffy trays. Usually -- they're reliable. But last year?

Well -- let's just say I wasn't happy and I was ready for a change.

Now -- we're not quite ready to start brewing our own seed starting mix just yet. I do have that recipe thanks to Farmer Fred Hoffman -- and he's got pretty good detail with his seed starting efforts here. But I knew I wasn't going to use the Jiffy peat moss pods again -- and I had already purchased three seedling trays from Capitol Nursery earlier this year.

What I needed was a good seed starting medium. And I found it at Lockhart Seed in Stockton. This stuff is called "Black Gold" and it is -- as advertised -- some of the softest and nicest seed starting mixes I've ever come across. It truly is "Black Gold." I have the seed starts to prove it.

Well -- if you want to get technical -- Venus has the starts to prove it.

So -- last Monday afternoon I dragged out the seed trays. Venus dragged out the tomato, pepper and eggplant seed. We both filled up trays full of Black Gold -- watered and compressed it down a bit with some lukewarm water -- and set about planting in the garage. One hour later? The deed was done.

Now -- just when you think you know everything there is to know about seed starting efforts -- a fickle thing called fate comes in and just slaps you silly. I had our PVC seed starting contraption all set up and ready to go. The grow lights were installed. And I knew -- from experience -- that those lights needed to be right at soil level.

Not a problem -- right? Hey, I KNOW THIS STUFF man! I have BEEN there! I have DONE that!

Imagine my chagrin then when I tried to lower the lights near those trays and those nice white plastic markers got in the way.

DOH!

If you're asking why those white markers are bent at crazy angles -- now you know why. They had been sitting straight up -- looking all pretty and nice. If you have also noticed the foil wrapped tightly around each seedling tray and might be wondering if this is one of our "tricks of the trade?"

Uh -- no -- it's because the idiot who blogs also purchased drain trays that have holes in them. I've got to catch that water runoff somehow -- right? So -- it was time for some Mickey Mouse ingenuity! Know what this means? It was my bright idea -- so it's bound to fail. Miserably.

The varieties planted are listed below in alphabetical order -- and we did plant two of each so -- yes -- there will be some "horse trading" taking part later this spring.

TOMATOES:

Abe Lincoln Original
Arkansas Traveler
Azoychka
Beefsteak
Black
Black Cherry
Black from Tula
Black Krim
Black Sea Man
Bloody Butcher
Brandymaster Pink
Brandywine
Campbells 1327
Cosmonaut Volkov
Druzba
Evil Seed (Black Tomato)
German Orange Strawberry
Green Zebra
Gulf State Market
Jelly Bean(Cherry)
Jubilee
Kelloggs Breakfast
Lemon Boy
Lemon Drop
Mortgage Lifter
Old Brooks
Pineapple
Red Alert
Rutgers Select
Tigerella

PEPPERS:
Alma Paprika
Anaheim
Cayenne Blend
Golden Cal Wonder
Green Cal Wonder
Habanero
Merlot
Mucho Nacho
Nu Mex Surprise
Piros
Purple Beauty
Purple Jalapeno
Red Beauty
Thai

EGGPLANT:
Black Beauty
Early Long Purple

L'amour, Gardening Style

Love, American Style is playing out in many American homes across the country today. There's nothing like "Valentine's Day" to bring out the lover in all of us -- although for some it's a little easier than others.

I will explain.

For some reason -- I had a strange fascination as a kid with a short-lived ABC series called "Love, American Style." It was -- well -- different. It was hip. It was campy. It was also kind of dumb, which is why it only lasted four seasons before hitting the trash heap.

Some years later, legendary producer Aaron Spelling came up with this brilliant idea to put "Love, American Style" on a cruise ship and BINGO! The Love Boat was born. Spelling made millions. The original creators of "Love, American Style" meanwhile, got heartburn.

Which just goes to show that LOVE is never easy.

It can be the same way with celebrating the holiday that is Valentine's Day at the Bird Compound in North Natomas. The wife can't be bought off with a dozen roses. Nope -- not gonna happen. A heart-shaped box of See's Candy? That will just sit in a kitchen cupboard for years as a small reminder to the husband that "he blew it big time."

The wife considers the purchase of roses that are produced outside the country to be a waste of money that can be better spent on cheap gin that comes in a plastic bottle. Chocolate -- meanwhile -- is just something that goes straight to the hips. Even though the wife is razor thin and slender -- she will suggest otherwise.

Arguing is pointless. You -- as the husband -- are just digging a deeper hole for her to bury you in.

Who said Love was easy?

But -- I have discovered through the years -- years of failure I might add -- that there are ways to please the wife that is Venus on Valentine's Day. A single daffodil plucked from the front yard in a single rose vase is "thoughtful" and does earn a limited amount of points.

Taking the wife to a seed store that features a GIANT HEART LOCK to buy vegetable and flower seeds on Valentine's Weekend? Ding, ding, ding. Winner, Winner -- Chicken Dinner! And so -- this past Friday -- the wife and I made our way to the romantic Port of Stockton to gaze at the ageless wonder that is Lockhart Seed in downtown Stockton.

I profiled this operation last year after reading Debbie Arrington's fine expose in the Sacramento Bee. Not much has changed since our last visit. I doubt much will change during our lifetimes. Lockhart Seed is a monument to the small commercial farmer and backyard gardener movement.

Let's just say they have everything under the sun and more and leave it at that.

Row after endless row of every gardening seed under the sun? Check

Enough seeds to plant an acre or two of your favorite bell pepper? Carrot? Pumpkin? Squash? Corn? Potatoes? Radishes? Bok Choy? TOMATOES?

Check, check, check -- and more check. You can't fool these people with gardening questions. They knew all the answers before you planted your first radish seed as a young boy or girl.

Lockhart Seed -- with it's dusty old wood floors and 1930's storefront appearance -- sort of traps you in nostalgia the moment you step inside those big double doors. From the trophy heads of long-gone animals high up on the walls -- to the old tin gardening signs -- any gardener worth his or her salt gives thought to moving in and never leaving.

Why leave Paradise? And who thought Paradise was in downtown Stockton of all places?

It can also mean trouble with a capital "T."

Case in point?

When Venus and I arrived, we found the store clerks busy collecting and bundling some short of strange vine -- that they would cut after bundling then put into a small bag for sale. When Venus inquired what they were packaging -- the reply was "asparagas roots."

Uh-oh. Guess what comes next.

"Honey -- I want to plant asparagas," the wife that is Venus excitedly told me.

"But, we're not ready for that yet," I patiently explained -- knowing the whole time that this argument was similar to digging yet another deep, deep hole.

"I don't care," she said in an urgent voice. "I want asparagas!"

Most people are taken in by impulse purchases of gum or the National Enquirer at the checkout counter. Those don't phase the wife a bit. They stay in racks where they are. But the train comes off the tracks when it comes to asparagas roots.

How did this end? Well -- I can tell you that we lightened the wallet by about $60.00 worth -- but that purchase did not include asparagas roots. However -- I have been given my marching orders. And asparagas roots WILL be on the menu for Valentine's Day 2011.

Otherwise -- she's going to fill in that hole I dug with quick-dry cement.

Lockhart Seeds is located at 3 North Wilson Way in downtown Stockton -- about a 45 minute drive south from Sacramento. Here's the kicker: If you try to visit during the weekend, you're going to find the front doors closed and locked. This place isn't open on the weekends. If you're serious about seeds -- you find time to visit during the week.

They are old enough and popular enough to set the mark and stick by it. This is one of the few companies that didn't need a website. Word of mouth provided all the traffic they needed and more.

However -- it does appear that Lockhard Seeds is about the join the digital age. A domain name has been purchased -- but there's precious little there except for the words "coming soon."

Monsters in the Backyard

We are growing monsters in the backyard.

This is a first for us -- in fact this year represents a year of many firsts for us -- as our garden plantings literally tripled from last year. A combination of raised beds and other planting areas made for a lot of extra room -- and we're making good use of it.

For example, last year I grew a variety of watermelon called the Sweet Diane. But this year? Thanks to the extra room? We are growing THREE varieties of watermelon, one variety of cantaloupe and yet another melon called "muskmellon."

What's a muskmellon you ask? I have no idea. Never had a muskmellon. At least, I don't think I've ever had a muskmellon. Perhaps they're like Snozberries? And, if you don't know what a Snozberry is, I'm sorry -- you're beyond hope.

Another new entry in the Back 40 Garden of Bill & Venus Bird is (drum roll please): Pumpkins. Not just any pumpkin mind you. Oh yeah, we're growing those as well.

But.....We're also growing something kind of "special."

It's big.

Courtesy of South Natomas gardener Nels Christenson, I give you: GIANT PUMPKINS. Not just any old pumpkin mind you. But seeds that are specifically designed to produce pumpkins the size of a VW Bug. Or, at least that's what I'm told. I'm not really sure to be honest. I mean, I've never grown a Giant Pumpkin before. Have you?

Nels obtained the seeds last summer while attending a class on -- surprise -- growing Giant Pumpkins. The class, offered through the Consumnes Community Service District, not only offered tips on growing giant pumpkins (according to Nels), but also resulted in the collection of some mighty interesting pumpkin seed.

This isn't your ordinary Halloween pumpkin seed. Not hardly. The two varieties that Nels acquired are called Wallace, and another variety that may be local to the Elk Grove area: Urena-Glasier.

How special is this seed? The photo to your immediate right should give you a pretty good indication. There are two pumpkin starters that germinated from seed. The first, purchased from Lockhart Seed in Stockton, is a variety called the "Hallow-Queen." But to the left of the Hallow-Queen is the Giant Pumpkin known as Wallace.

Can you see the difference between the two? Amazing eh?

I had intended to research both varieties of Giant Pumpkin Seed before writing this blog posting, but that's just a tad difficult. Type in the words "Urena" and "Glasier" and even the reliable GOOGLE has a brain fart. Try typing in the terms "Urena" and "Glasier" and "pumpkin" and Google returns with the message of "No Habla Ingles."

I knew that couldn't be true.

To put it short and sweet, finding information about these varieties isn't easy. However, I did run across a website called Pumpkin Nook during my quest for answers, and that took me to a special page called the 1100 Club.

It was there where I discovered the names of Elk Grove pumpkin growers Leonardo Urena and Pete Glasier. Both are record holding GIANT pumpkin growers (Urena clocked in with a 1200 lb. giant in 2005, while Glasier contributed an equally impressive 1195 lb. monster).

By putting two and two together, I can only surmise that somehow Nels got his hands on seed from those record pumpkin growing efforts. It's just a guess, of course, but it's the best guess I can make.

The Wallace, however, appears to have a completely different parentage. Google shoots back with a picture of a kilt-wearing Mel Gibson when you query "Wallace." It's not the Wallace I was looking for to be honest, but I came to learn that it is the "pollinator" I will need for growing Giant Pumpkins.

Further research shows me, what I am probably growing in the Back 40, is, in some way, related to the Dills Atlantic Giant, which is billed as the "World's Largest Pumpkin Variety" (just ask them).

This MONSTER variety, as the website claims, "is the grand-daddy of all giant pumpkins. The present day record, for this variety is an amazing 1689 lbs (767.7 kg) and it is common for the variety to produce 400- 500 pound (180-230 kg) fruit consistently. Used mainly for fall fairs and International pumpkin competitions that are becoming increasingly more popular around the world. Also perfect for huge jack o'lanterns and fall displays!"

I'm still not sure why I'm growing Monsters in the backyard yet, but it's true that I'm one of the few backyard gardeners in the Sacramento area to actually have the required room. So why not give it a shot? Why not do my best to grow the biggest pumpkin I've ever seen in my lifetime?

Just one question?

How am I going to get it out of the backyard?

The "Rinky Dink" Seed Starting Effort

I suppose you could also call this "starting seeds on the cheap," because it is that and more. Venus and I took the time to start more varieties of tomato and pepper seeds on Saturday, because demand for what is growing in nearby greenhouses is growing.

I started to get a tad worried when the brother-in-law called up from his Serrano neighborhood in El Dorado County and attempted to "reserve" six of our tomato plants. How nice of him. Not only did he want some of our heirloom starter plants for his gardening efforts, he also wanted to give some away to his neighbors.

Wait a minute. Does that sound right? He wants OUR tomato plant starter to give to HIS neighbors? The brother-in-law is known for his rather outlandish requests after consuming a quart or four of Canadian Mist Whiskey (which we refer too as "Canadian Moose Piss"), but his request for plants isn't the first and I don't think it will be the last either. In short, the backyard garden is back in a big way, and everyone wants those hard-to-find heirloom varieties.

I can't blame them. There's simply nothing quite like the taste of vine-ripened heirloom tomatoes. Once you bite into a Brandywine or an Azoychka, you're hooked.

Venus and I don't have a greenhouse yet (it's on the list of "things to do'), but we did convert and old wine rack into a seed starting rack -- complete with hooks to hold grow lights and space for heating pad to keep the babies warm. This is about as "frugal" as frugal can get, so experienced growers will be anything but "impressed." However -- as cheap as this setup is -- it does work.

Venus and I prefer to invest a few bucks in the Jiffy seed starting kits that are starting to appear by the millions in places like your big box stores (Walmart and Home Depot), and even in the smaller locations such as grocery stores or your independent hardware retailers. You can buy "big" like we did for large scale starting efforts. Or, if you don't have the room, you can buy the small package which looks very much like a carton of a dozen eggs.

These kits come complete with two trays and compressed peat moss pellets. All you need to do is add warm water, and those compressed peat moss pellets grow and expand like nobody's business. They have a somewhat erie resemblance to the pods featured in the now-famous movie "Alien," once they fully expand. However, I guarantee you that nothing is going to pop up and attach itself to your face.

After adding the appropriate amount of water (about a gallon) -- the pods are ready for planting. Venus and I planted three complete rows of green, red and yellow peppers. We then planted half rows of various heirloom tomato varieties, including Red Reif Heart, Pink Ping Pong, Green Zebra, Arkansas Traveler and a cherry variety we purchased at Lockhart Seed. It immediately drew Venus' attention, because the packet of seeds promised cherry tomatoes that are "very high in brix content."

That's important for an event that Venus and I will attend later this year with about three to four hundred other tomato nerds. An event that promises a payday of $2,500 or more! And for this event, you need tomato varieties that are high in brix content (the brix meter was developed to measure the sugar content in wine and table grapes, but does have other uses).

Venus and I used chopsticks to poke holes in each pod, drop in some seed, then use the chopstick to cover the seed. It's that simple. After labeling each row, we moved the pods inside the house to a bedroom converted for "seed starting purposes." If this looks "Mickey Mouse," I promise you that it is. But I promise you, this works. The seeds have everything they need to sprout and grow. The covered seed pods create a "rainforest effect," which is essential to starting seeds indoors. The heating pad ensures strong root growth and thick stems, and the light source is more than enough. In fact, the light might even be overkill.

As I've stated before -- you can put these seed starting kits on a windowsill and they'll be just fine.

From previous experience I know that the tomatoes will germinate first. The peppers usually need a bit more time. Peppers, unlike tomatoes, require HEAT to really get going, so these seedlings will be rather unhappy at first. But, by the time of plantout at the end of April, I'm expecting starter plants in the one to two foot range.

At some point, Venus and I will also transplant the pods into larger cups, but that's another project for another day.

Here's hoping we have enough to satisfy growing "demand." Stay tuned!

The "Mother" of all Seed Stores

Former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein didn't do much for his own people, but at least he had the good faith to contribute to American slang, when he promised U.S. troops the "Mother" of all battles during the first Gulf War.

American language and slang hasn't been the same since he uttered that "Mother" statement, and we've since been treated to the "Mother" of all sales, or the "Mother" of all storms even the "Mother" of all tomatoes.

Add another "Mother" to that list -- as in the Mother of all Seed Stores -- and Lockhart Seed is just that and more.

Sacramento Bee "writer" (when are we going to add "Editor" to that title?) Debbie Arrington first tipped me to the existence of this wonderful store a couple of weeks ago in the Home and Garden section of the Bee. You can read the article here.

Now, I like to think my knowledge of valley towns and places is pretty darn good. I've only spent ALL of my 45 years here. I know Fresno, Madera and Tulare Counties like the back of my hand thanks to my days of zipping around in a clown car for KMPH NewsRadio. I can tell you where you can find the best dish of Chorizo and Eggs (La Cocina on McKinley Blvd. in Fresno), the best deep-fried Calzone (Dicicco's) and the best pizza known to mankind (Zelda's Deep Dish pizza in Sacramento).

But I had no IDEA and no CLUE that a place like Lockhart Seed even existed. There's no excuse for that. They've only been around, and in the same downtown Stockton location, for something like eight decades. They've served generations of San Joaquin Valley farmers and are now making a big dent in that backyard gardening effort.

To put it short and sweet: Lockhart Seed has it all -- everything under the sun -- when it comes to the subject of seeds. You want onions? How about ten varieties? Is that enough? Pumpkin seeds? Corn? White, yellow, purple or red? What about lettuce? Okra? Spinach? Cabbage? Carrots? Radishes? Lockhart Seed has row after row after row of packaged seeds (not pictured), or you can buy in bulk from these shelves behind the main counter.

If you don't have the kind of land required for large planting efforts, not a problem. Lockhart Seed offers row after endless row after endless row of small garden packets for the backyard gardener. It's the type of display that will bring tears of joy to the average gardener, and I guarantee a visit to Lockhart Seeds will leave the wallet just a tad lighter. Of course, if you're into large-scale gardening efforts, I imagine that that these packages of Jalapeno Pepper seeds will be more than enough to satisfy your demand for what has been sometimes described as the "Mother" of all hot peppers.

Lockhart Seed isn't your average store. It's not necessarily a nursery, although you can find things such as fertilizer and soil there. It's not a Home Depot or some other big box store offering row upon row of gardening tools and other gardening implements, although you will find those items there as well.

In short, Lockhart Seed is a SEED store. We don't have many of those left. As a matter of fact, there's just one left on the West Coast. And that is Lockhart Seed. And while they offer all types and varieties of seed for every vegetable and flower under the sun, they have a leg up on other seed outlets. Lockhart Seed carries varieties that grow extremely well in our South, Central and North Valley locations. That's important, because what grows well in places such as New England or Maine, doesn't necessarily translate into success in California.

And I must also stop short of calling Lockhart Seed just a "seed store." It's more than that. This place is a freaking museum. It is a reminder of generations past. From the creaking wood plank floors to the diplays on the wall and crammed into every corner it seems, Lockhart Seed is something special. After all, how many of you knew that tomato seeds were once sold in tin cans like this? I found these packed away in a corner of the store, covered with dust. I don't think they've been touched in a very long time, and despite my advanced years, I had no idea that seeds once came in a can.

Although some gardeners had predicted the "demise" of Lockhart Seed, it appears those predictions were a bit premature. Business is up thanks to the recent articles in the Sacramento and Modesto Bees, and up because the "backyard garden" is suddenly "in vogue" again. Venus and I were first time customers when we made the trip from Sacramento earlier in the week. And we just happened to run into another couple of first-time visitors, also from the Sacramento area.

In short, this may have been our first visit to Lockhart Seed, but it won't be our last.

Lockhart Seed is located on 3 North Wilson Way in downtown Stockton, and its central, downtown location makes for easy access from either Highway 99 or Interstate 5. Unfortunately, it is not open on the weekends, which will mean a special trip if your work full-time like the wife and I do. But, I promise you this much: It's well worth the effort.